The glass is half full!!

The glass is half full these days!! As a matter of fact, everything is half these days. Why, you may ask. Because I am finally over the HALF way mark. I have now lost 70 pounds and I am ecstatic!! I can't believe that I have actually done it, and will finish doing it! And let me make one thing clear, if you are my friend and love me, please tell me if you start to see me in old behaviors and gaining weight. Yes I am sensitive and it may initially hurt my feelings, but rest assured after a day or two of hurt feelings, I will be Thanking You!!

It is so empowering to know that I am in control of my weight for the first time in a very long time. Kudos to Kristyl, if I do say so myself! I am proud of me, that is new for me too, lol!

Chugga Chugga, I think I can!!

I have had several people ask me why I haven't blogged lately. I just didn't want to bore you with what has become my life lately. Sleep, Eat (but Healthy), Go to YMCA to work out, then start over!! But I am happy to say it is paying off and I have now lost 53 pounds, I am so happy and also proud of myself!! I am slowly feeling more and more confident and certainly feeling much better physically!! Just keep praying that I continue to have the motivation I need to complete this task I have about 97 more pounds til I reach my goal of 150 ponds lost. But I keep thinking positive, I am more than a third of the way there. Thanks to all of my wonderful friends and family for your prayers, concern and encouraging words!!

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference!

One thing I am very Thankful for..My Family!!

Update!!

Lost 40 pounds now!!

Weight and Wait!!

Lately, God has blessed me with such a feeling of peace and contentment. This is very unusal for me when I am dieting. Lol. God has shown me through his word, not to worry about what my future will bring. He has a plan all worked out all I need to do is to trust him completely. He knows way better than I do what is best for me. I truly believe God will give me a child, if he thinks that is best, when he decides it is the time. For now, I must trust him, look to him and enjoy the blessings of this life he has given me. I am still eating healthy and exercising and I can honestly say God (along with med.) has also taken away my desire for food, which is a miracle in itself. I have lost 33 pounds now and feel so much better. Possibly better than ever before. Partly because of the weight loss, but also I see my future as an amazing adventure just beyond the horizon.

Open the Eyes of My Heart Lord!!

I have prayed and prayed asking God to make my direction to Motherhood clear. Sometimes it is and other times not so much. But I still know that He is guiding and directing me.
I have been successful in redirecting my focus to my health and weight loss knowing the other things I desire will follow if I keep my eyes upward to Him. I have recently found it easier and easier to eat healthy and exercise knowing the possible end result. Believe me I have prayed about this too! I believe no prayer is too small for God. I have now lost 24 pounds and I am becoming more and more encouraged daily. I want to be the best mother I can possibly be and being healthy is an essential element. It is amazing what we can accomplish if we set our mind to it and we keep God as our focus.

Today in Worhsip Kidstyle we sang "Open the Eyes of My Heart Lord". It was such a blessing to look around and to see these small precious children singing and understanding what they were singing. Sometimes, I think children understand things much better than we do. They don't complicate life like we tend to. I was touched by this song today and although I have heard it a million times, I feel like I really "heard" it for the first time today. "Open the eyes of my heart Lord, open the eyes of my heart, I want to see You!" That is so powerful!

Mixed Emotions!!

Today has been a great day and an awful day all rolled up in one.

I started the day today by doing my weekly weigh-in. I stepped on the scale to discover I have lost 19.5 pounds. I was bubbling over with excitement. It is so encouraging when everything you are doing to lose weight starts paying off. All morning I had this overwhelming feeling, "I will actually be a Mother some day" I kept thinking to myself over and over.

I had decided to talk to my boss today about raises for next year. I wasn't surprised, given the current economic situation, that salaries will be frozen for next year. In addition, an extra job I have been doing at the church will dissipate. I am so scared about the future.

I feel trapped!! I desperately want to have a child more than anything in the world but feel that it is just out of reach. What if I can't afford it?? What if I can't get pregnant?? What if I never have the one thing I really want??

Satan is really working on me today. I must remember Psalm 37:4, Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.